I swear I didn't write this

but I certainly do this most of the time -

I'm not sure why I am such a horrible person but I most definitely think that I am. Not horrible enough that people should worry for my sanity, or anything like that. I just feel that as they say your thoughts dictate our actions, and inside my head I am a horrible, horrible person. I see people's flaws and I ridicule them for things they can't control. The first thing I do when I meet someone, the very first thing, is I find something about them that I am better than them at just to boost my own personal self worth. If there is nothing I make something up. Quite simply inside my head I am a horrible, horrible person.

Now outside my mind is a totally different story. On the outside I am kind, considerate, thoughtful, honest to a fault, creative, funny, caring, and many other great things. Outside my head I am a good person. Sure I have moments when I let the inside come out and hang out with the outside but for the most part they are night and day.

So my question to you is which one is the real me? I know which one I think it is (the one who is good, with a tinge of horrible jerk, the one that will think horrible things about you but try to look past them and still care enough about you to help you when you need it. That would be me, to me.), but I want to hear what you think.

1 comment:

Jnuck said...

What I want to know is what you ridicule me for! That could be a fascinating conversation. I think you should write a post what you think about everyone in your head. :)

Dude, we all have shadows. Embrace it. Embrace your goodness too. We're all human.