Unfair expectations

There are very few things about being in a singles ward that I don't like. I like the minimal amount of children crying. I like the general similarities in age that I have with everyone in the ward. I like pretty much everything. The one thing I don't like however is the automatic assumptions that if you arrive at a meeting with a member of the opposite sex and you sit with them you are automatically dating that person. Take for example this conversation I had with my old roommate Spencer today at a Munch and Mingle (or whatever cheesy name they are giving these "go find an eternal companion" post church mixers these days):

Me: Hey Spencer how's it going?
Spencer: I'm good. And you?
A: I'm doing alright.
S: So how did you meet that orthodontist girl you were sitting next to in church?
A: Huh? Oh Joan? She's an Opthamologist not an orthodontist.
S: Oh right, how'd you meet her?
A: Um she lives a block away from me. I'm her home teacher, I met her like a month ago.
S: Oh wow that's cool.
A: (finally realizing what Spencer is thinking) We aren't dating Spencer. I'm just her home teacher and since she lives so close to me I ask her for rides to church.
S: Oh okay....

Now granted Spencer isn't the most socially... aware person I've ever met but still this isn't the first time it has happened to me. When I was first interested in she whom shall not be named our very own bishop came up to me to ask about her and if we were together. And it isn't just me that this happens to. I am certain there are at least 4 people that I can think of off the top of my head right now that constantly get bombarded with these same sorts of questions. Now granted I think those 4 people should just hook up already (in pairs of 2 naturally) but that is besides the point. if they just want to be close friends who happen to be of the opposite sex then that is up to them. If they want to date they will do it on their own time and if for whatever reason it decided they should announce to the whole world "Hey stop asking my girlfriend on a date, she's with me jackass" then they will do so on their own timeline not yours. I really hate to speak in such blatant terms because we're all grownups (unless you're like 12 and reading this blog in which case I'm mostly worried about your taste in reading material) but essentially the only thing asking does is make you look stupid. Seriously regardless of if they are in a relationship or not you look stupid. If someone wants to talk about their relationships they will, if they don't they won't. All you are when you ask is the annoying person who doesn't understand common courtesy. If you absolutely need confirmation on if they are in a relationship observe, watch, check for signals. It really isn't that hard.

I get that as a singles ward the whole point is to mark your territory and find your prey. I really do understand that. However there is such a thing called tact and perhaps it's time we as a group start utilizing it a bit more before bad things happen.

Uncool

Belated Promise part 5: Resolutions

First you will notice that I have skipped my happiest day as requested by Adam. Well you probably didn't actually notice but let's pretend you've been paying attention to previous posts and comments. The reason for this isn't because I don't plan on writing about it, but rather because I want to do it justice and not turn it into a depressing blog post. If you are going to write about something happy it should stay happy and I just can't wrap my head around how to do that with that specific day yet. It will be written about, just not yet.

Anyway Derek wanted to read about my New Year's Resolutions. Well first off an update of sorts on my LAST resolution. As you could probably guess once my updates dropped off the face of the planet I failed. I did make it considerably farther than my last update though and I came quite close. I made it as far as Superman IV to be specific which is about 25-30 movies short. I'm a little disappointed in myself but at the same time I really didn't think I was going to make it that far. A lot of extenuating circumstances led to this failure but in the end it was just me realizing that this was a really stupid resolution and I had better things to do with my time. I guess what I am saying is I actually listened to all of you eventually and gave up. I plan on revisiting this challenge eventually but right now I think I'm going to come up with some serious resolutions for this year. I've come up with a little bit of a list for you guys, let's see what you think.

I want to:

1. Walk around Green Lake twice a week.
2. Read all three of the books I got for Christmas this year.
3. Read my scriptures all the way through at least once.
4. Be more active at church.
5. Learn to appreciate my calling and become active in it.
6. Humble myself.
7. Create a regular sleeping schedule.
8. Move out of my parents house and stay out.
9. Be honest with everyone. Yes EVERYONE.
10. Update this blog regularly. Maybe not as regular as Amera updates hers (she's a blogging machine) but still more than I have been lately.
11. Take a lot of pictures with my new camera.
12. Save money.
13. Live in the present and not think so hard about the future.
14. Have the biggest and best 30th birthday party OF ALL TIME.
15. Go on one date a week. It doesn't have to be with different girls, or the same girls it doesn't matter, just as long as it's once a week.
16. Clean my room once a week.
17. Give Jen Nuckols a hickey.
18. Watch all 8 seasons of Smallville that I have on DVD.
19. Attend Opening Day.
20. Travel somewhere that isn't related to eating challenges.
21. Swear less.
    

That's just a small sampling really of what I want to do this year. Will I accomplish it? I hope so. I will with any luck keep you updated as to what's going on and how I am doing with these challenges. If any of you wonderful people out there would like to help me with these in some way I am certain I will need all the help I can get.

belated promise part 4: Unicorns

Hey look it's more videos! When Rachel suggested "Unicorns. Sparkly ones" I couldn't help but flash back on those wonderful "Planet Unicorn" cartoons. Episode 1 isn't my favorite but I'm still gonna go with this one to share with you. Good luck getting that theme out of your head. It won't happen.

belated promise part 3: Penguins and Flamingos!

Alright for this one I have decided to just go with an even bigger cop out than these blog posts have turned into: The video post!

First the penguins -



And then we have flamingos -



Thanks Mallory for the wonderful idea, I hope you like the videos.

Belated promise part 2: Mascots!

Alright so when we last met I answered mark's questions and now it's time to talk about what my good friend Jennifer suggested I write about: Sports Mascots. First I just wanted to say that Jen I like this subject so I'm glad you suggested it. Also you are awesome for even reading my blog a little bit and I appreciate it.

Anyway here is a quick list of the quirkiest and stupidest mascots I have ever encountered.

Clarkston Bantams of Clarkston WA.

Now they may call this thing to my left a "Bantam" but let's be honest here, that's a chicken. Oh sure it's a bad mother of a chicken, but it's still just as delicious with 7 herbs and spices. Who thought this was a good idea? I mean come on! Their rivals are a freaking Bengal tiger! How does a chicken stand a chance against a tiger? It doesn't that's how. Were they so desperate for a different mascot from most other schools in the country that they decided on one of the most docile creatures ever? What made them think this was going to scare anyone? Clearly this was thought of after a fairly traumatic experience at a petting zoo.*

The Orofino Maniacs of Orofino, ID
Okay I will admit, this one is kinda cool. I mean it's a Maniac. A crazy person is definitely threatening, especially a crazy person without pants on like the one illustrated as their mascot. The interesting thing about this one though is just how incredibly un-PC this one is. What makes the Maniacs so un-PC isn't just that it is a crazy person. No see Orofino... how do I put this... Well Orofino is the home of the North Idaho Insane Asylum. In an era where every single Native American mascot is coming under fire for being derogatory to Native Americans this one slips through the cracks. Normally I wouldn't think this way about a silly little mascot, it's harmless fun. But even I have limits of my bad taste.

*full disclosure: I went to their rival school, Lewiston High School so I might be a bit biased against their stupidity, but in fairness it's still a stupid chicken.

Belated promise part 1: The Mark Edition

Alright so this is a little later than I had promised but I am going to take the time to write about each requested item. Some will get more than others but that isn't so much me saying your suggestion sucked, but rather me admitting I don't know as much about Unicorns as I do my 2010 resolutions. Anyway this post is to talk about most of Mark's lovely suggestions.

1. Life without Mark is depressing. I found myself just randomly talking about him over breakfast with my friends Joan and Kenley about a week ago for no reason other than I missed him and wanted to talk about him. While Kenley has plenty of experience with Mark, Joan had never met him so I only hope our descriptions of him as a sweet natured cute little guy with a vile sense of humor but you let him get away with it because...well he's Mark, was valid enough to not scare her away from meeting him. Seriously though Mark, you are missed.

2. School is school. I am finding myself learning more about myself than I am about any of the subjects I am taking but then again if movies have taught me anything it's that that's exactly what a good education does.

3. Sorry Mark but my Corners will never be on this blog. Too many people read it and I don't want to make them think too much of something like that. Look for that somewhere else.

4. I'm gonna pull a cop out move on this one because I can't think of anything. Instead here is a blog post I wrote 9 months ago that I am sure not all of you read full of random things about me. Enjoy.

Up Next: Sports Mascots!