Belated promise part 2: Mascots!

Alright so when we last met I answered mark's questions and now it's time to talk about what my good friend Jennifer suggested I write about: Sports Mascots. First I just wanted to say that Jen I like this subject so I'm glad you suggested it. Also you are awesome for even reading my blog a little bit and I appreciate it.

Anyway here is a quick list of the quirkiest and stupidest mascots I have ever encountered.

Clarkston Bantams of Clarkston WA.

Now they may call this thing to my left a "Bantam" but let's be honest here, that's a chicken. Oh sure it's a bad mother of a chicken, but it's still just as delicious with 7 herbs and spices. Who thought this was a good idea? I mean come on! Their rivals are a freaking Bengal tiger! How does a chicken stand a chance against a tiger? It doesn't that's how. Were they so desperate for a different mascot from most other schools in the country that they decided on one of the most docile creatures ever? What made them think this was going to scare anyone? Clearly this was thought of after a fairly traumatic experience at a petting zoo.*

The Orofino Maniacs of Orofino, ID
Okay I will admit, this one is kinda cool. I mean it's a Maniac. A crazy person is definitely threatening, especially a crazy person without pants on like the one illustrated as their mascot. The interesting thing about this one though is just how incredibly un-PC this one is. What makes the Maniacs so un-PC isn't just that it is a crazy person. No see Orofino... how do I put this... Well Orofino is the home of the North Idaho Insane Asylum. In an era where every single Native American mascot is coming under fire for being derogatory to Native Americans this one slips through the cracks. Normally I wouldn't think this way about a silly little mascot, it's harmless fun. But even I have limits of my bad taste.

*full disclosure: I went to their rival school, Lewiston High School so I might be a bit biased against their stupidity, but in fairness it's still a stupid chicken.


amera hearts said...

love this posting! i read the first line and thought, "that's a angry chicken" and then you said the same thing!


Aimee said...

Isn't that a rooster? Roosters are more threatening than chickens. Just sayin'.

Unknown said...

I went to CHS and I must say that the Original mascot was a Sandpiper. At least the Bantam is a small step up. Also please note the attached definition...

ban·tam (bntm)
1. Any of various breeds of very small domestic fowl that are often miniatures of members of larger breeds.
2. A small but aggressive and spirited person.
1. Diminutive; miniature.
2. Aggressive and spirited.

Allen said...

Well Mr. Unknown I will say that an angry chicken is a step up, but I will still say that even the angriest of small aggressive birds stands zero chance against a tiger.