A brief post of thanks

As a male I don't usually get to receive the benefits of the Relief Society. I mean I get the benefits of their smiling faces and their wonderful company on dates and whatnot but I don't get that sense of community and sisterhood that a regular member of the Relief Society SHOULD get. Instead as a man I am subjected to the Elder's Quorum. Now I may be entirely off base when I say this but, at least with my experience with a singles ward EQ there is no community or real togetherness. Rather it's a bunch of males sizing each other up as competition and declaring themselves superior in some way to make themselves feel better. The sisters have enrichment where the get together and talked and craft and learn skills that better themselves as people while also growing closer together as sisters. The men however have "Manrichment" where we sit around and watch sports, or play video games while eating pizza and beating each other up either physically or via the bloody games. I think that just made my point for me. I do have some friends in the EQ, but for the most part I keep to myself and I find myself making friends with the sisters which probably bothers oh so many of my brethren which I will admit is at least part of why I do it.

Anyway back to what I was trying to talk about before I tangented myself into dangerous territory - the Relief Society. I honestly do think that the strength of any good ward is in it's sisters. Earlier this week my mom went in for gastric bypass surgery. After she was released from the hospital she was required to stay in a hotel here in Seattle in order to recover fully and make sure there were no complications. She couldn't just go home because she lives in Prosser and that's too far from the hospital for them to get to any problems in a timely manner. I tried to get the time off from work so I could stay with her all day while she was in the hotel but unfortunately a coworker had already requested the time off and I was the only other keyholder available to close the store so I couldn't get the time off I needed. What commenced was a stressful week of me trying to figure out how to ask for help and who to turn to. Naturally I turned to my friends from the church and I also talked to my boss about working my schedule so I was working the least amount of hours possible while my mom needed me.

I heard very little back from anyone that could actually help me. I had friends in Idaho and the Tri-Cities say they would help me in a heartbeat if they could. My EQP and friend Carl volunteered for the first night with my mom which was a huge load off my shoulders. Then my good friend Laura called and said she could help the second because it's her spring break. I had Sunday off thanks to my wonderful boss Wes, and then I started to get phone calls and emails from other SISTERS in the ward offering their time to help. A lot of them couldn't actually help but they sent their prayers and well wishes anyway. Then my friend Megan volunteered for Monday and it looked like all the shifts that I had told people about were filled.

One little problem - when I sent out the email I miscalculated when my mom was getting to go home. I thought she was leaving on Tuesday because that was the fifth day. It turns out that she needed to stay for five NIGHTS and so once again I was left with an open day. Miraculously I didn't even need to ask for help. Sunday in the morning I got a phone call from Whitney in my ward's Relief Society presidency making sure that I had all the days covered and asking if there was anything she could do. I mentioned that I still needed Tuesday night covered and she said she was going to take care of it. I felt relieved as I passed on the information that she needed and I went about my day believing that someone would come through and that Tuesday would be okay.

After church Whitney called me and said that not just one sister but two of them volunteered to help on Tuesday and that Erin would be there from 4-7 and that Geneva, a sister that met me for the first time a week ago, would watch her from 7 until I got home from work. Everything worked out and on top of it all my mom has been feeling better and better as the days go on. I can see her strength returning and her spirits lifted and I can't help but think that while spending time with me is part of the reason for it, I really think that being able to see that other people who don't even know who she is care about her enough to take 4-6 hours out of their day and spend it taking care of her out of the kindness of their hearts is a much bigger part of it.

I just wanted to take this time to say thank you to all of you who helped, or promised to help, or wanted to help my mom this past week. Specifically Laura O'Brien, Carl Cutler, Laura and Byron Schmidt, Megan Wixom, Erin Leigh Chapman, Geneva Pelfrey, Whitney Thompson, Rachael Knudsen, Aimee Elber, Andreanne Loiselle, Jon Cox, Derek Child, Kurt Kaiser, Brian "Little Bingo" Stephens, and Wes Miller. Without you guys working with me I really don't know how I would have survived these five days. Both my mom and I thank you from the bottom of our hearts for being the single most amazing people that I know. I love you all, and I never say that so you know I mean it.

new feature

So I have had an account on formspring.me for awhile now but I haven't bothered to do anything with it. Well that all changes now because if you will look to your right you will see a box where you can ask me questions. You don't have to tell me who you are if you don't want to (obviously I would like it if you did but whatever). you will have to go here to see the answers to your questions, but I think it will be worth it.

Essentially I am just playing around with another pointless social networking site in an effort to help make my life more open and available for those who want to hear about me, which as far as I am concerned should be everyone since I am incredible.

I have finally figured it out

After exhaustive research I have finally discovered why women are so completely insane. It turns out their minds are constantly trying to decipher every word and action that men such as I make. And of course as opposed to taking the logical and responsible thought pattern as to what a man is saying they twist it into some malfunctioning rude statement or a blatant attack on their person. Now before you misconstrue this as me being bitter and angry because a girl hurt me recently. I can assure you that that is far from the truth. No instead this morning while I was at work waiting to clock on thanks to MSN I stumbled upon a Cosmo test on "50 guy phrases translated". Now I'm a guy so I figured it would be good for a laugh and that I would see some sort of honest article to show to women that while occasionally we don't say what we mean, by and large we aren't some slimy jealous jerk who only wants to have sex with you and will say anything to accomplish that feat.

Holy crap was I wrong. First they only give 3 possible answers to the questions, and I'd say 75% of the time they are all snarky, horrible, and absolutely not what I mean when I say something. For example when I say "I like your shoes" that is not me trying to get out of trouble by saying something nice that I don't mean. No it means I like your shoes. THAT WASN'T EVEN A POSSIBLE ANSWER.

Seriously though women I have to know, do you actually think this way? Because I'll be honest I don't think most men are like that. Yes some of us are I will admit that. Some of us are so full of ourselves that we can't actually carry a conversation without it being about us and we will say anything to get out of an argument even "I like your shoes". However that's a minority. There are nice, honest, sincere, kind, loving, good men out there*. Stop trying to analyze what we are saying to find the base of our character, try our actions. Those are much more telling as to what we mean than what any ridiculous quiz will tell you.


*they're called homosexuals.

Thank you for entering my life, now please never leave me

I have an absolute crap load of music on my computer, 7,888 tracks to be exact. If I listened to all of the songs from beginning to end it would last for over 3 weeks without repeating a song. Obviously I have never actually achieved such a feat because I always seem to get distracted and find myself only listening to the newest stuff that I have downloaded and then my favorite artists when I get an urge to listen to say the Beatles or Outkast. However when I am out away from my computer I just put the entire archive on shuffle and let it go until the batteries die. Sometimes it plays a song that I enjoy, others it plays something that I just don't want to listen to at that time, which is where the skip button comes in handy. Occasionally it will play a song that I have never heard in my life. These moments are rare because I always try to educate myself on what I am downloading to see if I like it, but when you just download the entire catalog for a particular artist you are destined to come up with something weird. I've grown used to this and it has given me a few new favorite songs by my favorite artists that I wouldn't regularly have heard.

Earlier this week though something interesting happened. I found a song that I haven't heard of by and artist I have never heard of. I don't know where they came from, how I managed to download these songs or this artist, and I most certainly have no clue what made me go through the effort to download 6 tracks by this guy. All I know is that I like him. A lot. His name is Stephen Malkmus which isn't even a name I can connect to a stray download because of a name. It's like he came out of absolutely nowhere. He isn't even the type of music I regularly enjoy or listen to and yet I can't stop myself. And so here I am on my blog rambling incoherently like I am prone to doing about him. You should all go listen to him and discover a love for him much like I have. At least you'll know where you were introduced to him.

Bowling For Soup

Alright so I rarely do these types of updates but I had such a good time that I figured I should share with you, my wonderful blog readers (all 7 of you). Last weekend I went to my first concert of 2010. I went to see Bowling For Soup, which some of you might be surprised is still out making music and have several other songs besides 1985. As I am not one to come to something like this all on my own I brought along my friends Cassie, Hollis, Jon, and Michelle.

Guess which of these three didn't seem to belong at this concert

Now there were multiple highlights to this show which include:

Slow dancing at a punk Rock show.

MONETA!!

I couldn't tell if he was wearing this ironically or not.

And the most rocking and unfortunately supervised nine year old ever.

Now these "look what fun I had" blog posts aren't complete without videos so here are some that I took at the show.

1985 with wonderful singing along by myself.

A cover of Katy Perry's Hot and Cold that made me immediately think of Sarah Pearce.


My Wena, quite possibly my favorite song on their new album. No Hablo Ingles is a close second.


Their Encore, which proceeded to stay in my head for the next 3 days.

Great fun was had by all, and I can't wait for my next concert.

I was clearly the wrong person to ask to do this

In a follow up on my last post about writer's block I thought I would share with all of you what I wrote. This was all featured in today's ward newsletter.

Alright so I really don't know what I can tell you that you haven't heard already in regards to dating. I mean we've all been in a singles ward long enough to have heard all the boring cliches (yes even you freshmen). Be patient, go on dates, respect each other, be friendly, blah, blah blah, etc. etc. etc. It's a bored and tired record that I know I am sick of having spouted to me week in and week out. However I do have a few thoughts on the matter that I am going to share with you, feel free to ignore this and fold it into a paper airplane if you don't want to listen.

Ladies: No one wants to hear you complain about how no one asks you on dates. No matter how true it may be, chances are you really just mean that boy you like isn't asking you on a date. Perhaps instead of whining about it you should be proactive about it. Men aren't mind readers, we need you to tell us what you want. Maybe not as blatant as "you should ask me out for this weekend." but flirting is essential. And by flirting I don't mean hard to get flirting because hard to get just means high maintenance to most men.

Men: Stop being so shallow. I really can't say that enough. There are so many women in our ward that deserve to be asked out on dates that simply aren't because of some stupid juvenile thoughts on beauty. Looks will fade. She will put on a few extra pounds. It's her personality and soul that will stay through the ages and eternity.

Ladies: Remember your worth. If a man isn't treating you up to your worth he isn't worth your time or energy. You're amazing, always remember that. Don't stress about that one boy who isn't showing the affection you want, and deserve. He's an idiot who is missing out on you. You just need to go out there and live your life and be happy. Don't waste your pretty on jerks.

Men: You have a cell phone - use it. Email, Facebook, and texting has made us lazy. If you want to show a woman you are serious about spending time with her call her. It will mean a lot more than writing on her wall ever could. If you don't have her phone number, the next time you see her just ask. I'm sure she will be willing to give it to you.

Ladies: If a guy asks you on a date for the first time, say yes. No he may not be that dreamboat you've been eying in Sunday School, but it took a lot for this other fella to ask you out and you never really know just how much fun you could be having until you actually go out.

Men: If a woman declines your invitation for a date, and you aren't sure if she is blowing you off or not apply what I call the "Brad Pitt Rule". If Brad Pitt had asked her on a date would she have turned him down? No. She would have moved heaven and earth to make that happen. Now while you are not Mr. Pitt, if a woman is into you she would drop anything to go out with you. ANYTHING. Obviously there are exceptions and plans that cannot be moved, but if she is into you she will suggest another time for the date. If she doesn't do that, well you've been shut out and there is nothing you can do about it. But don’t worry, she probably isn’t as cool as you thought she was since she doesn’t appreciate your charms. Start pursuing another lady who will.*

Alright there you have it a few simple tips and unsolicited advice on how to date. I do have one more bit of advice for you ladies and gentlemen though if you haven't quite tired of this shtick yet: Just go out on dates. I figure the sooner all of us are married the sooner we can stop being the guilted and start laying on the guilt trips instead.


*The Brad Pitt rule was blatantly stolen from one of my favorite blogs "The Art of Manliness". The whole post can be read here

Writer's Block

Why is it that when I am given a specific topic to write about I can't think of anything to write, even if it's something that I have a lot to say about it, but when I have no real direction or thought into my writing it comes with ease?

Essentially I have been given my first real responsibility in my calling on the fellowshipping committee. They want me to write a little blurb on dating and relationships. I have thoughts in my head that I want to get out but I don't know how to say them without losing the point. I have a voice but I just can't find it.

But don't you fine readers worry, I have plenty of time to get this done. The deadline is tomorrow. Sleep is WAY over rated anyway.