I'm Getting Too Old For This

There really are few ways around it. It happens to everyone no matter how much it seems like it won't. I am becoming old. Not just in age mind you, I am not going to insinuate that the fact that I am turning 29 tomorrow is what I am fully blaming for this transformation, it's not. No I am getting old in mind, and body as well as the age factor. To put it bluntly: while I only look like this

I feel more like this:

I just feel ancient and old. All my friends are younger than me, and when you look at their faces you actually do see some sort of weird glow about them where they have so much to look forward to and they are just annoyingly happy about it. Meanwhile a lot of my good years are behind me. I have accepted my fate and while I have been able to find peace and joy within those confines I still don't feel the same way I did when I was 24. I know that glow isn't really there for me anymore. I still have so much to look forward to but instead of seeing it as something I have ahead of me I have reached the moments when I start to wonder if I missed something along the way.

And constantly looking into your past for something that wasn't ever there is pointless. You can't go back for it, even if you realize that one moment where if you had taken a left instead of a right your life would have been on the track you think you want. You still can't make that turn. It's done. You can't fix it. And so with that in mind I am going to turn my mind from the past, and look forward to the future. And hopefully I will find this again.