6.26.2009

I have found the stupidest song ever

Okay that might be a bit harsh to say but I honestly can't think of a song that is more absurd and awful. What is the name of this song? "Boy Meets Girl" by Evan Taubenfeld. This is the song that convinced me listening to the lyrics to songs is a horrible idea because they will make your head explode. Don't believe me? Here's the music video that for some reason decided they wanted to showcase these wonderful lyrics for all the world to see -



Now imagine hearing that song at least 3 times a day with no escape because you're at work. Let's delve into it's stupidity just a little more with an in depth look at the "lyrics" shall we? (the lyrics are in italics)

la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la,
la, la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Only slightly annoying. No real issue with this. Everyone likes a good la la right?


With a bang
She was there
yeah she blew up off my cover,
wasn't looking for a lover

Okay really? You weren't looking for a lover and yet it happened with a bang? Great message for your preteen audience there buddy.


And i crashed
I fell a part
And now i'm picking up the pieces
No, they're not exactly reese's


What are you E.T? Also I understand your audience loves candy but that doesn't mean you have to mention them in an attempt to find something they might understand about this song.


But it's a start
Did you ever think i'd let you go?
You're the only thing i've ever known


That certainly explains a lot about this illiterate jumbled mess of a song that you wrote.


Chorus:
Its like twisted sister
meets mr. mister
It's like a rolling thunder
Meets a careless whisper
Its like jesus jones and the rolling stones in a game of twister
Its Like Boy Meets Girl!
la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la,
la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,


Okay this drives me nuts. I have zero clue what he's talking about other than apparently Jesus Jones and the Rolling Stones love twister. Welcome to the land of fail Evan. Population: you and your career as a song writer.


And she went right.
And i went wrong.
By the time i turn around and look for her over my shoulder she was gone.


She must have been running really fast after hearing this loving tribute to her.


I'll never know
How to make her favorite drink
And does she like the color pink
and hate her toes?


You probably should have asked her these questions sometime before the start off "bang". Just a thought.


But did you think i'd let you go?
I Think I always knew that we'd grow old.


The song is about a girl that he met, slept with, and then lost. And yet he knew they would grow old together? Newsflash genius - you won't.


Chorus:
Its like twisted sister
meets mr mister.
It's like a shout at the devil (shout, oh)
meets a careless whisper.
It's like Motorhead and the grateful dead in a game of twister
It's like boy meets girl.


Where are all these famous rock bands getting together to play Twister? Also if I were Lemmy from Motorhead I would find this guy and rip out his spine just for mentioning them in this song.



Bridge:
When i when i saw you,i could see.
i wanna wanna have you lying next to me.


And you succeeded remember? Congratulations you finally got something right.


I wish that i can take it back.
put you on my favorite track, and play ya on repeat
And every day since then is incomplete.


Since when?


Chorus:
It's like twisted sister
Meets mr mister
Its like a rolling thunder meets a careless whisper
Its like Fleetwood Mac, Biggie and 2-pac in a game of twister.
it's like boy meets girl.


Okay. No. Stop with the Twister. I realize not a lot of boardgames rhyme with whisper but I don't care come up with something else.. Biggie and Tupac (by the way it's pronounces Tu pock not Two Pack idiot.) would never play twister, if for no other reason than they are dead. There is no need to have a total of 6 bands or musicians playing twister. Maybe a few of them could play Yahtzee, or even Monopoly.


la,la,la,la,la,la,la,la,
la,la,la,la,la,la,la, la
it's like boy meets girl.
la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la, la,
la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
Its like you and me girl(la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la, la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,)
You'll always be my girl (la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la, la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,)
la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,


This is too much with the la la.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

told you not to use the words 'pop' and 'music' in the same sentence.

crap... i did it again. :(

smiles :) said...

lol I loved this post! :) made me laugh, and hate this song, bonus! ;) I actually made myself watch the entire video, (it was painful), and I noticed a few highlights you left out of your scathing synopsis. Ready? ;)

1. The main redeeming feature of this crap song and crappier video? They're encouraging literacy with the sing along lyrics (there was even a bouncy ball at one point, like kareoke!)

2. When he's smearing himself with paint towards the end, he reminds me of a giant hotdog... I think that proves that he or I, or maybe both, lost our minds while listening to this song...

That is all :)