I have found the stupidest song ever

Okay that might be a bit harsh to say but I honestly can't think of a song that is more absurd and awful. What is the name of this song? "Boy Meets Girl" by Evan Taubenfeld. This is the song that convinced me listening to the lyrics to songs is a horrible idea because they will make your head explode. Don't believe me? Here's the music video that for some reason decided they wanted to showcase these wonderful lyrics for all the world to see -



Now imagine hearing that song at least 3 times a day with no escape because you're at work. Let's delve into it's stupidity just a little more with an in depth look at the "lyrics" shall we? (the lyrics are in italics)

la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la,
la, la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Only slightly annoying. No real issue with this. Everyone likes a good la la right?


With a bang
She was there
yeah she blew up off my cover,
wasn't looking for a lover

Okay really? You weren't looking for a lover and yet it happened with a bang? Great message for your preteen audience there buddy.


And i crashed
I fell a part
And now i'm picking up the pieces
No, they're not exactly reese's


What are you E.T? Also I understand your audience loves candy but that doesn't mean you have to mention them in an attempt to find something they might understand about this song.


But it's a start
Did you ever think i'd let you go?
You're the only thing i've ever known


That certainly explains a lot about this illiterate jumbled mess of a song that you wrote.


Chorus:
Its like twisted sister
meets mr. mister
It's like a rolling thunder
Meets a careless whisper
Its like jesus jones and the rolling stones in a game of twister
Its Like Boy Meets Girl!
la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la,
la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,


Okay this drives me nuts. I have zero clue what he's talking about other than apparently Jesus Jones and the Rolling Stones love twister. Welcome to the land of fail Evan. Population: you and your career as a song writer.


And she went right.
And i went wrong.
By the time i turn around and look for her over my shoulder she was gone.


She must have been running really fast after hearing this loving tribute to her.


I'll never know
How to make her favorite drink
And does she like the color pink
and hate her toes?


You probably should have asked her these questions sometime before the start off "bang". Just a thought.


But did you think i'd let you go?
I Think I always knew that we'd grow old.


The song is about a girl that he met, slept with, and then lost. And yet he knew they would grow old together? Newsflash genius - you won't.


Chorus:
Its like twisted sister
meets mr mister.
It's like a shout at the devil (shout, oh)
meets a careless whisper.
It's like Motorhead and the grateful dead in a game of twister
It's like boy meets girl.


Where are all these famous rock bands getting together to play Twister? Also if I were Lemmy from Motorhead I would find this guy and rip out his spine just for mentioning them in this song.



Bridge:
When i when i saw you,i could see.
i wanna wanna have you lying next to me.


And you succeeded remember? Congratulations you finally got something right.


I wish that i can take it back.
put you on my favorite track, and play ya on repeat
And every day since then is incomplete.


Since when?


Chorus:
It's like twisted sister
Meets mr mister
Its like a rolling thunder meets a careless whisper
Its like Fleetwood Mac, Biggie and 2-pac in a game of twister.
it's like boy meets girl.


Okay. No. Stop with the Twister. I realize not a lot of boardgames rhyme with whisper but I don't care come up with something else.. Biggie and Tupac (by the way it's pronounces Tu pock not Two Pack idiot.) would never play twister, if for no other reason than they are dead. There is no need to have a total of 6 bands or musicians playing twister. Maybe a few of them could play Yahtzee, or even Monopoly.


la,la,la,la,la,la,la,la,
la,la,la,la,la,la,la, la
it's like boy meets girl.
la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la, la,
la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
Its like you and me girl(la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la, la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,)
You'll always be my girl (la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la, la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,)
la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,


This is too much with the la la.

Oh yeah I have a Blog

After being called out for lack of writing by no less than 79 people* (actually 2 but let's pretend I'm popular) I have decided to let everyone know how my birthday went. The entire weekend I was freaking out because I still had at least half of the tickets that people had purchased for the baseball game, and I was worried that people were going to back out or that I wouldn't see someone and then they wouldn't have the ticket that they paid me for. I don't know if I am going to do this again next year because of this stress. I took a lot out on my friends (sorry again everyone), and I wound up worrying about nothing.

So here's how I spent my actual birthday -

I woke up from a phone call from my good friend Zach who was supposed to be coming into town for my party. Turns out he had a little financial mishap and couldn't make it. I was completely understanding and we put some casual plans in order for a game later in the season.

I then laid around the house and watched movies.

At 3 I finally got ready to go out and I then caught a bus down to Safeco. The gates opened at 5 but I had to drop off a jersey that I needed to get lettered that I purchased for myself as a birthday present. I also had to drop some tickets off at will call for the people who I don't see all that often but were still coming. So I had 2 hours before most people would arrive to kill and I was by myself. Yay!

Quick note: I didn't mind being alone or being there as early as I was. It gave me a chance to get my jersey done before the game started and I also got to walk around the stadium and say hi to all my old co-workers that I love oh so much. I did wind up spending some more money on a Russell Branyan T-shirt but it was still a good thing I got there early.

The first guest I saw was Julean, unless you count seeing Ally and Morgan in the bus depot and them not seeing me. I don't know how they missed me but I'll take it. There were a total of 60 people including myself at my party and it was a lot of fun. My favorite part surprisingly enough was when everyone sang me "Happy Birthday". I usually hate this part and find it incredibly embarrassing but for some reason it just made me smile when at least 100 people are singing to me. Yes there were only 60 people there that knew me but complete strangers felt compelled to sing along. As Mark so wonderfully put it "it sounded like the entire ballpark was singing to you."

Oh yeah last year due to some diet mix up I didn't get a birthday cake. My friends were nice enough to not make me a cake because I was on a diet. I respect that. Still I whined about it for the entire year, at every single birthday party and every other chance I had. So in return I received two birthday cakes this year. Moral of the story: Whining and complaining work. I should do it more often. Big thanks to Mark Johnson, Kaylene Faucette and Leah Plank for the cakes, they were a little dry. Work on that for next year ;)

I only have a small batch of pictures from the game but I wanted to say thank you to Aimee for taking every last one of them.

I love this place... and Imri's failed Nazi salute.

Aimee loves taking pictures of me on my phone. I think I am on it a bit too much
Have no fear my texting thumb is a-ok!
If you ever have a chance, watch sports with Kurt. He knows absolutely nothing but it's hilarious!

this is about a third of the people there for me.Morgan and Jenny: I hate them for stealing my thunder. It's my birthday and yet which freaking adorable couple got on the big screen twice? Pure hate!This is Aimee. She took these pictures. Coincidentally this is probably the only time I saw her smile at the game. Why? Because I'm a jerk that's why.Stephen Barr: The latest person in history. he showed up in the 7th inning. I'm still glad he came though.

My birthday presents

So as all of you should know today is my birthday (if you don't know this why are we friends again? Oh yeah, I'm awesome.) With every birthday comes the memory of birthday presents and the awesome parties you had growing up. And then the depression sits in when you realize there will be no presents this year, because you're too old for that sweet lego set you want.

one day this will be mine!

However I have been doing a lot of thinking and I have grown to realize that I may not get flashy toys, or that new bike I have always wanted, but I still get birthday presents. And so with that I am going to share with you all of the awesome birthday presents I have received this year. try not to be jealous they are pretty awesome.

1. My mom gave me life and the constant knowledge that no matter how much I screw up she will always love me. She also gave me the peace of mind that comes when you know the people you love the most love you back.
2. Shawn Trieber helped me to understand just how much I mean to those I have come in contact with throughout my life, even if I have lost contact with them until recently.
3. The Youngs in particular Leah, Anna and Margaret have given me a sense of family that I forgot I had. It feels so good to know that I belong.
4. Zach Wadsworth gave me the joys of knowing that people do love me.
5. 60 people have reminded me that I am someone people love to hang out with and enjoy being around. I would list them here but I don't want this to get too long.  
6. Dean has given me a new life so many times and kept me from jumping that I feel as if I owe her my entire life.
7. Mark Johnson has given me a level head, not allowing me to think too highly of my accomplishments while still making me feel like a success.
8. Derek Child has been an amazing example to me of the type of man I should strive to be through his actions and unwavering love for his friends.
9. Kristin Wegener and Holland Avery have given me an understanding that sometimes the things I do and say can hurt those that I love the most. I don't expect you to ever call me your friend again but I still wanted to take this time to say I am sorry.
10. Chris Draney gave me a friend when I had none.
11. Aimee Elber has taught me that even the most angelic of people can grow frustrated with the actions of others, and yet they still try so hard to make everyone around them happier.
12. Serena Miles has taught me a lot about forgiveness.
13. Kurt Kaiser has provided me with laughter and acceptance, when all logic should dictate that I should have been kicked out of his little pink playhouse a long time ago (mostly for saying things like he has a little pink playhouse).
14. Twitter has given me an outlet for all of my thoughts.
15. This blog has given me a place to rant so those around me don't have to listen to it (oh they still do but on a much smaller scale than before)
16. Jon Cox has given me a glimpse into the man I could be if I just stopped being so negative.
17. Adam Hamilton has given me, for the first time ever, actual regret and sadness over not writing him on his mission. I'm still not going to write him because I'm a stubborn jerk like that but I do feel bad about it.
18. My dad has given me my sense of humor, my intellect, and my love of all things shiny.
19. My stepmother has given me an increased awareness of organic and the benefits of shopping locally.
20. And finally (I wanted to do 29 but this was getting to be way too long) all of my friends have given me acceptance, joy, peace, and love. I don't say it enough but I do appreciate all that you have given to me, whether you have known me for a day, a month, or in the case of many of you my whole life. When I find myself asking why I keep going, you are the answer. Thank you all for your birthday presents, they mean more to me than you will ever know.