Oh yeah I have a Blog

After being called out for lack of writing by no less than 79 people* (actually 2 but let's pretend I'm popular) I have decided to let everyone know how my birthday went. The entire weekend I was freaking out because I still had at least half of the tickets that people had purchased for the baseball game, and I was worried that people were going to back out or that I wouldn't see someone and then they wouldn't have the ticket that they paid me for. I don't know if I am going to do this again next year because of this stress. I took a lot out on my friends (sorry again everyone), and I wound up worrying about nothing.

So here's how I spent my actual birthday -

I woke up from a phone call from my good friend Zach who was supposed to be coming into town for my party. Turns out he had a little financial mishap and couldn't make it. I was completely understanding and we put some casual plans in order for a game later in the season.

I then laid around the house and watched movies.

At 3 I finally got ready to go out and I then caught a bus down to Safeco. The gates opened at 5 but I had to drop off a jersey that I needed to get lettered that I purchased for myself as a birthday present. I also had to drop some tickets off at will call for the people who I don't see all that often but were still coming. So I had 2 hours before most people would arrive to kill and I was by myself. Yay!

Quick note: I didn't mind being alone or being there as early as I was. It gave me a chance to get my jersey done before the game started and I also got to walk around the stadium and say hi to all my old co-workers that I love oh so much. I did wind up spending some more money on a Russell Branyan T-shirt but it was still a good thing I got there early.

The first guest I saw was Julean, unless you count seeing Ally and Morgan in the bus depot and them not seeing me. I don't know how they missed me but I'll take it. There were a total of 60 people including myself at my party and it was a lot of fun. My favorite part surprisingly enough was when everyone sang me "Happy Birthday". I usually hate this part and find it incredibly embarrassing but for some reason it just made me smile when at least 100 people are singing to me. Yes there were only 60 people there that knew me but complete strangers felt compelled to sing along. As Mark so wonderfully put it "it sounded like the entire ballpark was singing to you."

Oh yeah last year due to some diet mix up I didn't get a birthday cake. My friends were nice enough to not make me a cake because I was on a diet. I respect that. Still I whined about it for the entire year, at every single birthday party and every other chance I had. So in return I received two birthday cakes this year. Moral of the story: Whining and complaining work. I should do it more often. Big thanks to Mark Johnson, Kaylene Faucette and Leah Plank for the cakes, they were a little dry. Work on that for next year ;)

I only have a small batch of pictures from the game but I wanted to say thank you to Aimee for taking every last one of them.

I love this place... and Imri's failed Nazi salute.

Aimee loves taking pictures of me on my phone. I think I am on it a bit too much
Have no fear my texting thumb is a-ok!
If you ever have a chance, watch sports with Kurt. He knows absolutely nothing but it's hilarious!

this is about a third of the people there for me.Morgan and Jenny: I hate them for stealing my thunder. It's my birthday and yet which freaking adorable couple got on the big screen twice? Pure hate!This is Aimee. She took these pictures. Coincidentally this is probably the only time I saw her smile at the game. Why? Because I'm a jerk that's why.Stephen Barr: The latest person in history. he showed up in the 7th inning. I'm still glad he came though.

My birthday presents

So as all of you should know today is my birthday (if you don't know this why are we friends again? Oh yeah, I'm awesome.) With every birthday comes the memory of birthday presents and the awesome parties you had growing up. And then the depression sits in when you realize there will be no presents this year, because you're too old for that sweet lego set you want.

one day this will be mine!

However I have been doing a lot of thinking and I have grown to realize that I may not get flashy toys, or that new bike I have always wanted, but I still get birthday presents. And so with that I am going to share with you all of the awesome birthday presents I have received this year. try not to be jealous they are pretty awesome.

1. My mom gave me life and the constant knowledge that no matter how much I screw up she will always love me. She also gave me the peace of mind that comes when you know the people you love the most love you back.
2. Shawn Trieber helped me to understand just how much I mean to those I have come in contact with throughout my life, even if I have lost contact with them until recently.
3. The Youngs in particular Leah, Anna and Margaret have given me a sense of family that I forgot I had. It feels so good to know that I belong.
4. Zach Wadsworth gave me the joys of knowing that people do love me.
5. 60 people have reminded me that I am someone people love to hang out with and enjoy being around. I would list them here but I don't want this to get too long.  
6. Dean has given me a new life so many times and kept me from jumping that I feel as if I owe her my entire life.
7. Mark Johnson has given me a level head, not allowing me to think too highly of my accomplishments while still making me feel like a success.
8. Derek Child has been an amazing example to me of the type of man I should strive to be through his actions and unwavering love for his friends.
9. Kristin Wegener and Holland Avery have given me an understanding that sometimes the things I do and say can hurt those that I love the most. I don't expect you to ever call me your friend again but I still wanted to take this time to say I am sorry.
10. Chris Draney gave me a friend when I had none.
11. Aimee Elber has taught me that even the most angelic of people can grow frustrated with the actions of others, and yet they still try so hard to make everyone around them happier.
12. Serena Miles has taught me a lot about forgiveness.
13. Kurt Kaiser has provided me with laughter and acceptance, when all logic should dictate that I should have been kicked out of his little pink playhouse a long time ago (mostly for saying things like he has a little pink playhouse).
14. Twitter has given me an outlet for all of my thoughts.
15. This blog has given me a place to rant so those around me don't have to listen to it (oh they still do but on a much smaller scale than before)
16. Jon Cox has given me a glimpse into the man I could be if I just stopped being so negative.
17. Adam Hamilton has given me, for the first time ever, actual regret and sadness over not writing him on his mission. I'm still not going to write him because I'm a stubborn jerk like that but I do feel bad about it.
18. My dad has given me my sense of humor, my intellect, and my love of all things shiny.
19. My stepmother has given me an increased awareness of organic and the benefits of shopping locally.
20. And finally (I wanted to do 29 but this was getting to be way too long) all of my friends have given me acceptance, joy, peace, and love. I don't say it enough but I do appreciate all that you have given to me, whether you have known me for a day, a month, or in the case of many of you my whole life. When I find myself asking why I keep going, you are the answer. Thank you all for your birthday presents, they mean more to me than you will ever know.

I'm Getting Too Old For This

There really are few ways around it. It happens to everyone no matter how much it seems like it won't. I am becoming old. Not just in age mind you, I am not going to insinuate that the fact that I am turning 29 tomorrow is what I am fully blaming for this transformation, it's not. No I am getting old in mind, and body as well as the age factor. To put it bluntly: while I only look like this

I feel more like this:

I just feel ancient and old. All my friends are younger than me, and when you look at their faces you actually do see some sort of weird glow about them where they have so much to look forward to and they are just annoyingly happy about it. Meanwhile a lot of my good years are behind me. I have accepted my fate and while I have been able to find peace and joy within those confines I still don't feel the same way I did when I was 24. I know that glow isn't really there for me anymore. I still have so much to look forward to but instead of seeing it as something I have ahead of me I have reached the moments when I start to wonder if I missed something along the way.

And constantly looking into your past for something that wasn't ever there is pointless. You can't go back for it, even if you realize that one moment where if you had taken a left instead of a right your life would have been on the track you think you want. You still can't make that turn. It's done. You can't fix it. And so with that in mind I am going to turn my mind from the past, and look forward to the future. And hopefully I will find this again.

Birthdays and Baseball

I wasn't always a baseball fan. In fact I distinctly remember in my interview one of the first questions asked was if I was a fan of the Mariners. The girl I had my group interview ecstatically went on and on about how she loved the team and going to games. I shrugged my shoulders and said that I had only been to two MLB baseball games my entire life and I went mostly for the environment. I even admitted to being more of a football fan.

She didn't get the job, I obviously did. Since then I have become a follower and a fan. I went to about 20 games last year for various reasons ranging from boredom to family and everything in between. If I open and there is a game that night, chances are I am going to that game even if I don't have friends going with me. I won't say that baseball has supplanted my love of the NFL but it has officially taken root in my life and I don't expect it to go anywhere regardless of if I remain employed by the Mariners.

Every year for the last 2 years I have been at Safeco Field on my birthday, and every year it has been one of the more memorable days of the year. Two years ago I was working, I had forgot to request it off. I forget what the big event was on this day but i do remember being asked by Marc our boss down at the ballpark the ever important question "What day is it?" To which led to this conversation:

me: "my birthday"
Marc: "really?"
me: "yeah, and you made me work ya jerk"
Marc: "you shoulda requested it off it isn't my fault"

I believe that cemented the love my job, because there are very few people who can get away with calling their boss a jerk, in front of the entire staff, and not get reprimanded at all.

After transitioning out of the ballpark at the end of the '07 season and into Bellevue Square I was able to actually plan my birthday party around going to the baseball game. The only issue was my birthday was on a Sunday this year. And with almost all of my friends that I wanted to spend time with on this oh so special day being Mormon and actually wanting to be seen as good people I wasn't sure how many people would want to come to the game with me.

I invited everyone. I wasn't expecting a huge turnout so I figured the more I invited the more fun Mormons I would corrupt and convince to join me. I think i had 14 people come join me at the ballpark. We had $7 center field bleacher seats and it was a lot of fun. My good friend Zach came in from the Tri-Cities to spend the entire week with me, we even took in 5 baseball games that week. My ex girlfriend Tori came to visit and brought two of her close friends with her from Yakima, and then some of my best and closest Seattle friends also came along for the game. Aimee was even kind enough to make homemade cracker jacks for everyone complete with prizes. The only aspect of my life not represented was my Lewiston Years, a transgression I hope to resolve soon. We had a glorious time, the Mariners lost (if you paid any attention to Seattle sports last year that was kinda common practice.) but it didn't matter, I was with my friends and I was happy.

This year once again the Mariners have a home game on my birthday. They face Baltimore and it's on a Monday. Once again I invited everyone. It's 1/2 family night down at the ballpark which means $10 seats and we actually get decent seats this year. I don't know how good the game will be, and I don't really know who's gonna come (so far 22 people have said yes and 25 people have said maybe. Like I said I invited everyone) but I do know that regardless it's impossible to have a bad time when there is baseball and birthdays especially when you have friends like I do who constantly bring joy to my life just by being in it.